9 Phrases Smart People Never Use in Conversation

These seemingly benign comments lead to the awful feeling that comes only when you’ve planted your foot firmly in your mouth.

BY TRAVIS BRADBERRY. Author, ‘Emotional Intelligence 2.0’ [Featured IMAGE: Getty Images

We’ve all said things that people interpreted much differently than we thought they would. These seemingly benign comments lead to the awful feeling that comes only when you’ve planted your foot firmly in your mouth.

Verbal slip-ups often occur because we say things without knowledge of the subtle implications they carry. Understanding these implications requires social awareness–the ability to pick up on the emotions and experiences of other people.

TalentSmart has tested the emotional intelligence (EQ) of more than a million people and discovered that social awareness is a skill in which many of us are lacking.

We lack social awareness because we’re so focused on what we’re going to say next–and how what other people are saying affects us–that we completely lose sight of other people.

This is a problem because people are complicated. You can’t hope to understand someone until you focus all of your attention in his or her direction.

The beauty of social awareness is that a few simple adjustments to what you say can vastly improve your relationships with other people.

To that end, there are some phrases that emotionally intelligent people are careful to avoid in casual conversation. The following phrases are nine of the worst offenders. You should avoid them at all costs.

1. “You look tired.”

Tired people are incredibly unappealing–they have droopy eyes and messy hair, they have trouble concentrating, and they’re as grouchy as they come. Telling someone he looks tired implies all of the above and then some.

Instead say: “Is everything OK?” Most people ask if someone is tired because they’re intending to be helpful (they want to know if the other person is OK). Instead of assuming someone’s disposition, just ask. This way, he can open up and share. More important, he will see you as concerned instead of rude.

2. “Wow, you’ve lost a ton of weight!”

Once again, a well-meaning comment–in this case a compliment–creates the impression that you’re being critical. Telling someone that she has lost a lot of weight suggests that she used to look fat or unattractive.

Instead say: “You look fantastic.” This one is an easy fix. Instead of comparing how she looks now with how she used to look, just compliment her for looking great. It takes the past right out of the picture.

3. “You were too good for her anyway.”

When someone severs ties with a relationship of any type, personal or professional, this comment implies he has bad taste and made a poor choice in the first place.

Instead say: “Her loss!” This provides the same enthusiastic support and optimism without any implied criticism.

4. “You always …” or “You never …”

No one always or never does anything. People don’t see themselves as one-dimensional, so you shouldn’t attempt to define them as such. These phrases make people defensive and closed off to your message, which is a really bad thing because you likely use these phrases when you have something important to discuss.

Instead: Simply point out what the other person did that’s a problem for you. Stick to the facts. If the frequency of the behavior is an issue, you can always say “It seems like you do this often” or “You do this often enough for me to notice.”

5. “You look great for your age.”

Using “for your” as a qualifier always comes across as condescending and rude. No one wants to be smart for an athlete or in good shape relative to other people who are also knocking on death’s door. People simply want to be smart and fit.

Instead say: “You look great.” This one is another easy fix. Genuine compliments don’t need qualifiers.

6. “As I said before …”

We all forget things from time to time. This phrase implies that you’re insulted at having to repeat yourself, which is hard on the recipient (someone who is genuinely interested in hearing your perspective). Getting insulted over having to repeat yourself suggests that either you’re insecure or you think you’re better than everyone else (or both!). Few people who use this phrase actually feel this way.

Instead: When you say it again, see what you can do to convey the message in a clearer and more interesting manner. This way the person you’re speaking to will remember what you said.

7. “Good luck.”

This is a subtle one. It certainly isn’t the end of the world if you wish someone good luck, but you can do better because this phrase implies that they need luck to succeed.

Instead say: “I know you have what it takes.” This is better than wishing her luck because suggesting that she has the skills needed to succeed provides a huge boost of confidence. You’ll stand out from everyone else who simply wishes her luck.

8. “It’s up to you” or “Whatever you want.”

While you may be indifferent to the question, your opinion is important to the person asking (or else he wouldn’t have asked you in the first place).

Instead say: “I don’t have a strong opinion either way, but a couple things to consider are …” When you offer an opinion (even without choosing a side), it shows that you care about the person asking.

9. “Well, at least I’ve never …”

This phrase is an aggressive way to shift attention away from your mistake by pointing out an old, likely irrelevant mistake the other person made (and one you should have forgiven her for by now).

Instead say: “I’m sorry.” Owning up to your mistake is the best way to bring the discussion to a more rational, calm place so that you can work things out. Admitting guilt is an amazing way to prevent escalation.

Bringing it all together

In everyday conversation, it’s the little things that make all the difference. Try these suggestions out, and you’ll be amazed at the positive response you get.

What other phrases should people avoid? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

Walk will never be the same

A Japanese engineer just invented a nifty new way to travel: A transporter called a “WalkCar” that’s small, light and apparently easy to use.

The product is battery powered and is about the size of a laptop. And although it looks like it can hold much weight and is made from aluminum, it can apparently have as much as 265 lbs on board.

Now this is another business idea, on how you can have a business with success, sales impact, a system, and with a product that can put you in front of the business trent.

Contact me HERE to share my business plan that can help you leverage your effort and make you money for any of your goals.

Source: Reuters

Medicare fraud

This is the two major problems of capitalism. 

Ignorance & Greed

loretta-lynch-medicare-fraud
Attorney General Loretta Lynch announced the Fed’s biggest Medicare fraud takedown this week

The FBI arrested 46 doctors and nurses across the country this week in the largest Medicare fraud bust ever. 

243 people were arrested in 17 cities for allegedly billing Medicare for $712 million worth of patient care that was never given or unnecessary. Learn more at Medicare Fraud CNNMoney

My question is, what is the difference between uneducated people and this medical sector?

Neither, it is just a lack of financial education that gives this result. This is what the self employed sector doesn’t understand; the difference between wealth and making a lot of money.

Medicaid_fraud

Everyone has to learn to form a cash flow system, not work for money… It’s not easy working, but it rewards you after a period of time.

My fellow followers, continue to my blog, I am preparing a simple 3 step process on making a cash flow system for you to use in your meantime while working towards becoming wealthy

Keep in touch, Patrick Iturra

Facial Rejuvenation Market

Global Industry Analysis and Forecast to 2020

Facial rejuvenation is a cosmetic and medical procedure used to increase and restore the physical appearance of a human face. It also defined as a set of surgical procedures used to restore facial geometry and skin appearance of youths.

The global facial rejuvenation market is categorized based on various products, services and equipments used in rejuvenating of skin. Product segment is further sub-segmented into topical rejuvenation products and filler and botulism products. Topical rejuvenation products include moisturizers, keratolytics, prescription sunscreens, retinoids and hair removal creams. Facial rejuvenation service segment covers chemical peel, microabrasion, surgical restoration and dermabrasion. Equipment segment includes laser resurface and photodynamic therapy systems.

SimpleDermaCare_botox

In recent time, increasing aging populations is key driver of global facial rejuvenation market. Aged people require effective rejuvenating products to protect their skin form sun damage. They also use facial rejuvenation products and services to restore youthful appearance. Increasing number of road accidents has also fueled the growth of global facial rejuvenation market. Plastic surgeons use facial rejuvenation products and services to repair and treat trauma which occurred during accidents. Combination therapies of rejuvenation products also attract end users to adopt these products for facial aesthetic procedures. For instance, botulinum toxin can be used in conjunction with dermal fillers and chemical peels to improve the outcomes of facial rejuvenation. This type of combination therapy also prevents the formation of new lines and wrinkles.

The global facial rejuvenation market reached a value of approximately $3.8 billion in 2012, rising from a total of $3.2 billion in 2010. Growth within the market looks set to continue over the coming years, with a valuation of $6.6 billion expected by 2017.

Growth will be driven by a number of factors, including an increasingly ageing global population, and an increasing focus on appearance in developing counties such as Brazil, China and Mexico.

Facial rejuvenation is any cosmetic or medical procedure used to increase or restore the appearance of a younger age to human face.

The specific term, however, refers to a set of surgical procedures which try to restore facial geometry and skin appearance which are typical of youth, by using a combination of brow lift, elimination of eye bags, eyelids lift, elimination of senile spots, skin aging, facial sagging and wrinkles by face lift and rhytidectomy and physical or chemical peeling, chin lift (reduction of double chin), and restoration of facial hairline.

SimpleDermaCare

A major contributing factor to growth in the global facial treatments market is the aging worldwide population. The baby boom generation control approximately $2 trillion in spending power and 50% of all discretionary income. This segment of the population has a demonstrated a great desire to retain a youthful appearance, which has been driving growth for aesthetic products.

Furthermore, modern society’s obsession with appearance not only for personal reasons but also for perceived competitive advantage is driving the global facial rejuvenation market.

In 2011, the American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS) estimated 119,026 facelifts, and 46,931 forehead lifts (also known as a brow lift) were performed.

However, while surgical procedures are preferred to achieve a more dramatic improvement, the current trend is for less invasive procedures, such as injectables (Botox, fillers) and laser skin treatments. While these treatments achieve temporary results, they tend to be preferred due to their less intensive recovery period.

Major players currently dominating the facial rejuvenation market include Allergan, Valeant, Merz, Galderma, Syneron/Candela, Obagi, Cynosure, Syneron, Solta, Lumenis, Palomar, and QMed/Galderma.

Full Report: Persistence

Are you middle class?

Everyone’s talking about saving America’s middle class. But just who exactly falls into this group?

That’s actually a much more difficult question to answer than it seems. While some experts define the middle class by income, others define it by lifestyle. Still others say it’s a state of mind.

Here are five different ways that economists, federal agencies and even the White House measure and characterize the middle class.

family of four on grass with hands up and dream

What is middle class, anyway? Click HERE to learn more

Are you middle class? Are you considered middle class where you live? Use this calculator to find out CNNMoney/calculator 

12 Rules for Start a Business

Mark Cuban’s 12 Rules for Startups 

Anyone who has started a business has his or her own rules and guidelines, so I thought I would add to the memo with my own. My “rules” below aren’t just for those founding the companies, but for those who are considering going to work for them, as well.

I’m Patrick Iturra, my team and I can help you build a cash flow with a systematic process and capitalize faster.
With this process, you can earn massive lucrative passive income that you can use to start your project.

Create your own money.
Contact me HERE to get more information.

Source: ENTREPRENEUR

Economic Crisis 2015 & Great Opportunity

 Economic Crisis 2015 – Peter Schiff & Mike Maloney

Recently Peter Schiff visited Mike Maloney in California. During his stay they filmed nearly 3 hours of discussions about precious metals, freedom, and the economy in general.

Over the next few weeks we’ll be publishing a series of these videos, so make sure you are subscribed as this analysis is not to be missed. In this first installment, Mike and Peter discuss hard evidence that a huge economic crisis awaits us in the not too distant future.

Contact me HERE, to receive a cash flow business strategy, build your own system, and take advantage of this economic crisis

The future of mass transit

Hyperloop

http://money.cnn.com/video/technology/innovationnation/2015/05/14/hyperloop-safer-cheaper-railroad-alternative-transportation-of-the-future.cnnmoney/index.html

CNN’s Rachel Crane visits a group of entrepreneurs in Los Angeles that are planning to build the world’s first Hyperloop, a high-speed, energy efficient mass transit alternative.

Learn more: Tesla Energy

More about: Business Ideas